muddy hands

throwing in the flag

2007-02-04T12:26:00.000-08:00

a white flag.
a thought.
an action.

SURRENDER.
to yield (something) to the possession or power of another; deliver up possession of on demand or under duress-
to give (oneself) up, as to authority-
to give (oneself) up to some influence, course, emotion, etc.-
to give up, abandon, or relinquish.
to yield or resign (an office, privilege, etc.) in favor of another. –
to give oneself up, as into the power of another; submit or yield.
the act or an instance of surrendering. (cited source dictionary.com)

Lord, I surrender my home and earthly goods to you.
Father, I give my entire life to you.
Dear Jesus, I surrender my life to hardship or suffering for you if it be Your will.
I will give up the comforts of this world for You, I abandon the idea that anything can satisfy my soul but You, and I relinquish my desires that are not of you.

Here Am I - Send me...

loud living

2007-01-16T22:28:00.000-08:00

...and with a loud voice ... Luke 8:28
Our heavenly father is truly amazing. Amazing does not really begin to describe Him. He works in such mysterious ways and He continues to pursue us with passionate love. He has been revealing much lately about LIVING! I found over 50 references to a loud voice in the Bible. We are not to be silent -- in words or actions. I'm ready to live loud. What about you my friend? So much of our time on this earth is wasted -- we forget that Jesus came that we might have abundant life. That we might live loud for Him because of Him. Man, that really gets me jacked up! I want to shout it out sometimes. I want to scream it out sometimes. And sometimes I forget to live loud. Why do we waste away our precious hours giving the enemy free reign in our thoughts? In our activities? In our emotions? Jesus came that we might LIVE -- that we might live for Him. We are to bring every thought captive to the obedience of Christ. My dear friends, did you hear His truth? He said every thought! So why do I worry about this, that, the other? Why am I downcast? Why do we starve our souls when we have the bread of life to feed upon and the living water to overflow and refresh our parched hearts. Why don't we LIVE? I want to live. LIVE LOUD. When we love God with all our heart, our soul and our strength, then we obey His commands and we experience real living. And we all know that to live we must die -- not just once, but daily --sometimes minute by minute. The Word says to "present yourselves as a living sacrifice " because we have been "crucified with Christ, and I live; yet no longer I, but Christ lives in me." (Rom 12:1 & Gal 2:20) What needs to die in my life? Pride. Anger. Jealousy. Laziness. Rebellion. Complaining. Greed. Lust. Envy...May we all find ourselves DYING to LIVE!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Father, Search me and reveal those things that are not pleasing to you. Help me to die to the things of this world that pull on me everyday. Thank you for the power, love and sound Mind that only you can give. Thank you for loving me enough to discipline me. Thank you for drawing me to you. Give me the desire to obey in the small things, so that I may be trusted in the big things of God. I am your servant. Take my life. All of me. Yes, I know that Jehovah has set apart the godly for Himself. Jehovah hears when I call to Him. I will forever offer the sacrifices of righteousness, and trust in Jehovah. He has put gladness in my heart. My soul rejoices in Him. Praise and glory to the almighty Maker of heaven and earth. I am your servant.

home sweet home

2006-12-04T21:05:00.000-08:00

1958 cozy cottage.

a common phrase heard when someone enters our house might be, " it reminds me of my grandmother's house." No, it does not have the odor of mouth balls! My home is not new, designer decorated or even clean most of the time. But what we have is so much more. Our home is like a gingerbread house -- loaded with lots of sweet treats. Our home is loaded with hugs, kisses, laughter and joy. Our home is full of the sweet spirit of Jesus Christ. If the walls could talk -- they would tell numerous stories of friends and families that have passed through the door and touched our lives. When 'Moe' and I purchased our house he gave me a card that reads:

Today (7-29-96)...

We have purchased only a shelter.

Its sole purpose is to contain our home. We are the decorators. Our love will give beauty to every wall, room and doorway. The view from the street only assumes that happiness burns from the lamp in the window. We must maintain the brilliance even through the most difficult of times. I dedicate my life to making ours a happy home. Always knowing that God is first in our lives, I will give my heart and soul to assure your happiness as long as I shall live. You are the Queen of our castle and I will love you forever!

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Father, I am grateful to have such a wonderful home. I praise You that You have been the landlord for us and have kept up the maintenance that we so often need. You have blessed us over the years even in the most difficult times. I thank You for all the people that have laughed, cried, encouraged and prayed with us in our home. Thank you for each child that has ran through my house and yard with great smiles on their faces. Bless each person that has been welcomed into our home. Touch their lives eternally and give them the desires of their heart. We know that we are only passing through and look forward to the "gingerbread houses in the sky". We honor You above all things. Amen.

fahrenheit sweltering

2006-11-13T22:01:00.000-08:00

brilliant.

sizzling.

intense.
Your love, Your kindness and Your passion shines so radiant in the backdrop of an empty, dark world. You captivate our being with absolute truth and sovereign wisdom. You can not be controlled or weakened. You ignite in my soul a desire to be consumed by You alone. May Your sparks fall on me and reach the deepest crevices of my soul. Burn away the desires that keep me from being completely Yours in total surrender. You are the light that leads our way when we stumble in darkness, despair and discouragement. Your flame of hope encourages us to follow the way back to shelter and strength. Draw me closer to You so much that my eyes are fixed in a constant gaze on Your word and life. Melt my heart to fit the mold of Your pleasure. Fill me with love that rages beyond control. Engulf me through and through -- body, spirit, and mind with allof You - O' Mighty God. May my footsteps leave a trail of burning blaze that spreads the Gospel of Christ Jesus to the unreached places of Your world. Use the flames of joy, peace and passion to ignite a wildfire of renewal and revival in the dry hearts of discontent and complacent beievers. Fan the flame and make us whole. Overwhelm us with Your power and might. Totally consume my every thought, word and deed. Refine me that I may be a vessel of honor.

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Heb 12:29 For our God is a consuming fire.

morning glory

2006-11-02T23:43:00.000-08:00

The heavens declare the glory of God; and the expanse proclaims His handiwork.
The heavens declare His righteousness, and all the people see His glory.
Thy mercy, O Lord, is in the heavens; and thy faithfulness reacheth unto the clouds.
Be thou exalted, O God, above the heavens: and thy glory above all the earth...
And blessed be His glorious name forever; and all the earth is filled with His glory! Amen and Amen.
-Psalm 19:1,Psalm 97:6,Psalm 36:5, Psalm 108:5, Psalm 72:19
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Father, Your majesty displayed throughout Your creation is breathtaking. How could I ever doubt that the Maker of the heavens and the earth could not handle my trivial life. May I live each day remembering Your truth and promises. Guide us in Your truth. Show us Your ways. The glory belongs to You.

today's forecast: stormy

2006-10-16T22:12:00.000-07:00

Storms cause tree roots to grow deeper.

Are you in the midst of life's storms? Is it so dark that you can barely see the shelter? Jesus calms the storms. He created the storms. He said to trust Him in the storms, you of little faith. Will you trust Him to guide you through the storm to safe shelter? Will you only praise Him for the sunshine? Do not the beautiful flowers need the rain? How will you grow without water? Jesus is the living water. He is all you need. Allow Him to be your covering. Hide under the shadow of His wings. He shall cover you with His feathers, and under His wings you shall trust. Call on Him, and He will answer; He will be with you in trouble. Trust in the Lord with all thine heart. Lean not on your own understanding and in all your ways acknowledge Him and He will make your path straight. Even in the storm. His word will be the lamp to guide your path. He will light the way in the darkest of storms. The storms only last for a season. After the storms have passed...you shall be like a tree planted by the rivers of water, that bringeth forth fruit in due season; his leaf also shall not wither; and whatsoever you do shall prosper. When the forecast calls for storms -- remember that it is always bright after the storm!************************************

Father, remind me to praise you in the storms. Remind us Lord that in order for our roots to grow deep in you, there must be storms in our life. Help us not to be afraid, but instead to ride out the storm with you. Teach us to be prepared to run to your shelter. May we shine in the storms of life so that others can see the refuge and safety of the lighthouse -- you are a beacon of hope. I will forever praise you in the storms. Amen.

" 10"

2006-09-21T21:02:00.000-07:00

moe. the man. my man.
You captivated me with a gentle stare that was hard to resist.
Your eyes sparkled with kindness.
You were everything that I was looking for and so much more.
God has blessed us with a wonderful marriage and friendship.
It has been my honor and joy to be your bride of ten years.

I have enjoyed the adventure of living life with you.
We have truly been tested and tried through sickness and health... richer and poorer... still, our love grows deeper.
I'm thankful that God has been our solid foundation that has kept us from crumbling in the darkest of hours.

We do not know what our future holds, but we know that He holds our future.

Thank you for caring for me physically, mentally and spiritually.

I love you for encouraging me and believing in me.

I love you for forgiving me.

I love you because you treasure me.

Thank you for being a loving daddy to our spunky, fun boys.

Thank you for being a gentleman and still opening my door.

I love you because you laugh when I become "Maria".

Thank you for tolerating my pretend Broadway performances.

I love you because you have not given up on me.

Thank you for taking me and our boys across the world to share the love of Jesus Christ to others in Romania. I love watching you lead.

I love you because you trust me to educate our children.

Thank you for working hard, so that I could stay home with our children.

Forgive me for the times I am unappreciative and wanting more than we really need.

God has always provided for us -- Praise Jehovah Jireh!

I love you for being the best percussionist I have ever known.

Thank you for dedicating your talent, time, and music to the Maker of heaven and earth.

I love you because you are moe. And there is no other!

You are still as fine as the day I saw you in the red polo.

You grow more handsome with age.

I love you because you love God's Word and worshipping Him above all things.

Your face shines because Jesus lives in you.

I am thrilled to live the rest of my life with you.

I anxiously await the next leg of our journey with the Lord Jesus Christ.

I trust your relationship with the Father, so I trust you with my life.
...For where you go, I will go. Where you stay, I will stay. Your people shall be my people, and your God my God... (Ruth 1:16)

Love You Forever, Your Princess

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Almighty God, Father and friend, thank you for loving me so much. Thank you for the blessing of a husband with a servant's heart. You have so graciously given us more than we could have ever imagined. We praise and exalt Your name high above the heavens. We wish to honor you through our marriage. We desire to be obedient to your commands and follow you wherever You may lead us together. May our relationship mirror You. Forgive me for not giving my very best to this marriage at times. Forgive me for being selfish more than selfless.

Thank you for allowing us ten beautiful years. Through the trials we have faced, we have learned to trust and depend on you. You are our Strong Tower, Comforter, Shield and Strength. May our lives glorify You.

brownies

2006-08-27T20:13:00.000-07:00

nicknames are common in our home.
moe usually refers to us all by "brownies", hence the deep,rich brown eyes my family possess.
we all have much in common, but at the same time, many differences. I am thankful for my awesome trio of gentlemen!

my "moe" ... true man of god, running passionately after the things of God, kind, gentle, servant, encouraging, considerate, strong, polite, giving, outstanding percussionist, calm,cool & collected, peacemaker, passionate, loyal, forgiving, funny...
my "crash" ... sensitive, sincere, adventurous, smart, relational, caring, creative, compassionate, silly, loud, happy, daring, great memory, wide open, lego building fanatic, heart toward God...
my "tuggie" ... funny, talkative, loving, determined, outgoing, expressive, curious, dramatic, sword fighter, friendly, brave, independent, entertainer, confident, little prayer warrior...
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Thank you God for reminding me of the blessing of family. You have given me more than enough. My husband is incredible. Help me to realize what I have and not take him for granted. May I be the servant to my family that honors you. Thank you for laughter. Smiles. Snuggles. Teach us to enjoy each day together. I pray for those who desire to have a family, but are not able to. Fill them with peace and joy in knowing that you can make a way when it seems impossible. May we delight in You more than anything. You are very gracious to us Lord and we praise Your most holy name. You are such a great daddy. You have been so kind to give me "moe, crash & tuggie". They are the three coolest guys I know!

summershine

2006-07-16T22:05:00.000-07:00

sizzle & sparkle. hot & dry. summer is here -- give it a try!
summertime fun – bike rides, beach trips, all day swimming, movies & more movies, visits to grandma’s, picnics, sleepovers and much, much more. Enjoying your summer? We sure are.
However, not everyone is having such fun under the sun. Some have the summertime blues… hard to imagine that one could not absolutely love and enjoy every moment of such a great season, but life is not always cupcakes and ice cream, beach balls and sandcastles? What’s the answer for brighter days?

This is how our family has made it through the heat of the summer:
1. Slather on an extra coating of “sonscreen”- the more, the better
(Don't forgot to put on your protection!)
---And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, in order to prove by you what is that good and pleasing and perfect will of God. Romans 12:2
---Put on the whole armor of God so that you may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil. Ephesinas 6:11

2. Hydrate with an extra gallon of thirst quenching water
---He who believes on Me, as the Scripture has said, "Out of his belly shall flow rivers of living water." John 7:38
---"But whosoever drinketh of the water that I shall give him shall never thirst; but the water that I shall give him shall be in him a well of water springing up into everlasting life. "John 4:14

3. take more opportunities to find true rest
---He makes me to lie down in green pastures; He leads me beside the still waters. Psalm 23:2
---Be still, and know that I am God: I will be exalted among the heathen, I will be exalted in the earth. Psalm 46:10

4. get outside and enjoy the sonshine
---So if the Son sets you free, you are free through and through. John 8:36
---For the invisible things of him from the creation of the world are clearly seen... Romans 1:20
---Then shall the righteous shine forth as the sun in the kingdom of their Father... Matt 13:43
---For the LORD God is a sun and shield: the LORD will give grace and glory: no good thing will he withhold from them that walk uprightly. Psalm 84:11

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Father, I praise you. I praise you for being the creator. Father. Lover. Teacher. Friend. You are everything I need. Teach me your ways. May I be transformed by your endless mercy and overwhelming, undeserved love. You blow my mind! You make my life to shine. May I radiate your truth to all who I meet and know. Forgive me for neglecting to protect my heart and mind. Renew me through Your word. Oh how it gives such joy to my spirit. Fill your children to overflowing with rushing waters from the wellspring of Your kingdom. Draw beleivers to your presence where they can find true rest. May we not be settled until we sit at the feet of the giver of life. May we find contentment and peace in knowing that You alone are in control and that You alone can be more than enough! God, I desire to delight in You more than anything else this world has to offer. Thank You for pursuing me. Thank You for shining down on me. Thank You for good, bright days. May your children go forth into the nations spreading Your hope like the sun's rays reach down and warm my face. I love you. You are so big. How could I ever limit you? You are limitless. Wow.

tears in His bottle

2006-05-02T21:02:00.000-07:00

bottles are quite interesting to me. glass bottles vary in shape, size and color. glass is so fragile but strong. glass can be plain or very elaborate. glass can be colorful or colorless. Whether colorful or colorless - it remains transparent. Completely visible and totally exposed. My life in Jesus Christ reminds me of glass. When I live my life visible to others they can see my true colors. When my flaws and imperfections are clearly seen by others; then His grace and mercy shines through and radiates a beautiful prism of hope and love. Openness of one's soul causes others to see not just the outside, but what the inside looks like. Honesty with who we are causes love and friendship, sympathy and compassion, encouragement and accountability, support and rebuke, serving and praying for each other. One thing I have learned in the last few years is to share and bear my soul to others. I cry often. For many reasons. Tears of Joy. Sadness. Pain. Disappointment. Compassion. Christ sees all my tears. Many of my tears come from trying to please others. The world looks at me and sees the chips, cracks, shattered pieces --Christ sees me as who I was meant to be. He looks beyond the imperfections and sees true beauty and character. He created me in His image. He cares for me. Today He reminded me that He cares --
Thou tellest my wanderings: put thou my tears into thy bottle: are they not in thy book? " (Psalm 56:8)
He sees every tear that streams down my cheek. He knows when my heart is breaking. He knows when I'm trying to hide from the pain brought on by sin. He knows the pain of sorrow. He knows the sadness of disappointment. He has a record of my doubts, fears, and discouragement. My tears are in His bottle. He looks into His bottle -- sees His daughter crying and comforts me. He cares for me. He loves me. He gives me reason to rejoice. He gives me reason to laugh. He gives me reason to smile. He is my joy. He gives me brilliant life and shining hope. Pleasing my Great Maker is what I desire the most.
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Abba Father, You know the deepest desire of my soul is to honor You in all that I do. Take my broken, imperfect life and use me to shine for You. Yes, I am prone to wander from the one I love and the truth that I know. Forgive me for seeking approval in others and my worth in things. I trust You and know that what You begin you will see to completion. May I glorify Your name by living a transparent life so that others can see what forgiveness and love really look like. As we run this race, I will keep my eyes on You, the author and finisher of my faith. You make all things beautiful. Thank You for understanding me. You are such a great friend to me. Thank You for creating me to be fragile, but strong in the Lord and full of His might. Praise the Lord. In Jesus Name. Amen.
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In case you did not know: The Romans had a custom, that in a time of mourning - on a funeral occasion - a friend went to one in sorrow, and wiped away the tears from the eyes with a piece of cloth, and squeezed the tears into a small bottle of glass or earth, which was carefully preserved as a memorial of friendship and sorrow. - Albert Barnes

today

2006-04-19T22:07:00.000-07:00

hard day. mental day.
God surrounded me with His compassion and comfort.
Today ... I was overwhelmed with my house chores. God reminded me... people in Romania would love to have a house
Today... I did not want to cook. God reminded me... people in Romania would love to have food to cook
Today... I wanted to be left alone. God reminded me... people are heartbroken, because they are always alone
Today... I wanted my kids to be quiet. God reminded me... to be thankful that they had a voice and want to talk to me
Today... I did not like the girl in the mirror. God reminded me... I am the daughter of The King. He loves me deeply and delights in me.
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Yes, I believe His word:Be anxious for nothing.Do all things without complaining or arguing.Be still and know I am God.Children are an heritage of the Lord.I have loved thee with an everlasting love.For he is Lord of lords, and King of kings: and they that are with him are called, and chosen, and faithful.By this, I know He delights in me, because I have triumphed.Thank you Jesus for coming to my rescue today. I knew what to do -- call on you. You always answer. I will trust Your Word. I will trust Your promises given to me. You are transforming me to your likeness and it does feel good. Even when it hurts.

78 books + The Book

2006-03-28T12:58:00.000-08:00

i dont know... call me weird. i just love books. the pictures. the words. the smell. The local librarian must think we are freaks of some sort. Because after she scanned my 12 newest selections, she peered intensely over the rim of her glasses and asked in a reproachful tone --"Mam, you do know that you still have 66 more books checked out?" You may be wondering yourself -- am i afraid i wiil never get to the library again? or do I love to sniff different books all day? no.no.no. I just love too many of them--I get overwhelmed- and I want to take them all home. The limit is 50, but i'm on good borrowing status, so they override my account. Now I am allowed 100! Is that insane or what? Have you heard the saying, "books can take you anywhere, teach you anything, and allow you to imagine you are anyone you want to be. It is so true. They are treasures to be discoverd. So is God's Word. The more I read His stories, parables, travels, teachings,commands, promises... the more I realize that I can do all things with His strength. I can not become whoever, but who He really intends and desires for me to be. I can also go so many places-- He loves world travelers. He has the best self-help chapters and actually provides all the help you need. His book includes poetry, song, drama, comedy, financial advice, parenting tips and love letters. The best thing about His book is that He speaks to you while you read. Hebrews 4:12 says it best," For the Word of God is living and powerful... It is not a book on tape --It is just ALIVE! Check it out. No late fees. Just treasure and adventure to be discovered.
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Oh Lord, how I do love your word. Even when it cuts to my very core. The more I study- the more I know you. Thank you that you wrote this book for me to enjoy. May my beloved sisters and brothers in Christ savor each and every word that we read. May the truth dwell in us richly. As we read your law, love, commands and promises - teach us to be like you. My heart's desire is to live a life of radical adventure always being transformed into your image while sharing you with others. Take my life - it is yours. Give me the desire to devour your word not just daily, but throughout my days. When the chapters of my story are written I pray that your name is written over and over on each page. Praise you Jesus for the greatest story ever told. Your daughter, Muddy Hands
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Again, the kingdom of Heaven is like treasure hidden in a field, which when a man has found it, he hides it, and for the joy of it goes and sells all that he has, and buys that field. Matthew 13:44

oh, the places you'll go!

2006-03-14T21:08:00.000-08:00

work of art by Crash

are you on the road to nowhere?
are you off the beaten path?
have you made a wrong turn?
have you come to a dead end?
have you come to a fork in the road?
are you sitting at the crossroad?
do you even know where you are?
Just stop and ask for direction. Locate your guide.
Take the scenic route by traveling on the Highway to Holiness. Jesus is the
Highway to Holiness. In John 14:6 Jesus said to him, I am the Way, the Truth, and the Life; no one comes to the Father but by Me. He is all the road map we need. He gives signs to point the way. There are markers along the way to remind us where we have been. With Him as our guide there are no wrong turns. When we are weary, He says rest in me. When we fall asleep at the wheel, He awakens us with His gentle voice. When our eyes are not on the road, He reminds us to be focused. When we are out of gas, His word refuels us. When we are tired of driving and the destination seems too distant, He says may I take over now!
Join me, my friend, on the road that is often less travelled. However, I warn you -it is not always a smooth, easy ride. But it is the wildest, most exciting trip you will ever take. The world is yours for the seeing. It is quite an adventure. Oh, the places you'll go!
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Father, Your people must become holy. You say to be holy, for you are holy. I understand it is not about perfection, but about excellence. Striving for your best. What keeps us from your presence? Reveal areas in our lives that require immediate turns. Guide us away from things that lead us down the road of destruction. Gently guide us back when we wander off the path of righteousness. I am blown away to know that when you see me - you see me as "holy and blameless". How could you love me so much? Thank you for the spiritual markers I can see in my life. Sway me with your love to want to go wherever you lead. Even when the ride is a little less comfortable and the terrain is unfamiliar. May we all find ourselves wanting to be on adventure with you. Whatever preparations it takes for us to be ready - please insist those to us. Strip away things not needed. Reveal the sin that needs to be left behind in order to move ahead with you. I love you, Lord and I lift my voice to worship you. Blessed be your name.
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A highway shall be there, and a road, And it shall be callled the Highway of Holiness. The unclean shall not pass over it, But it shall be for others. Whoever walks the road, although a fool, Shall not go astray. Isaiah 35:8

what if

2006-03-11T15:35:00.000-08:00

multitudes. variety. colors. differences. similarities.
culture is great. being cultured is great. But today I thought, what if: my sons never attended an opera, never performed in the local theatre, never gazed at masterpieces in art galleries, never visited the Smithsonian, never played a stringed instrument, never saw a hit on Broadway, what if...what if... Would their life be lacking?

But...what if they saw the multitudes? what if they saw the variety, colors, differences and similarities of God's people? what if?

His true girl

2006-02-25T20:50:00.000-08:00

The LORD thy God in the midst of thee is mighty;

he will save, he will rejoice over thee with joy;

he will rest in his love, he will joy over thee with singing. Zep 3:17

God smiles. He rejoices over me. He is so in love with me. Even when I show no affection toward Him. He never gives up on me. His love is continual and unconditional. He is pleased when I glorify His name. When I seek to please Him - I am pleased as well. When my delight is in him - I become a delight not only toHim, but to others. Regardless of who I am, or think I am, He knows the truth. The whole truth. Nothing but the truth. He knows the depth of my being because He knew me before the foundation of the earth. I'm His "true girl!"

As my oldest son and I giggled together about his charm with the little ladies, he proceeded to tell me that he had a "true girl". You know, "the one who is in your heart", he says to me. Innocently, he blushed and I smiled inside and out. I'm glad to be God's true girl. He is all about me. He digs me. He thinks I'm the bomb! He paints sunsets for me. He sends songbirds to deliver beautiful sonnets to awaken me some mornings. He sends me flowers. How could I not be in love with Him? He gave His life for me. How promising to know true love. Reassuring. Comforting. Hopeful. All I ever wanted.
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Jesus, Lover of my soul, thank you for being so in love with me. Thank you for never leaving me. I praise you for shouting on mountaintops with me and holding me tight in the dark valleys. You are so beautiful. Your creation thrills me. The design and detail of each person, place, and thing is so unique. What fun you must have when you create your masterpieces. Your word says that your invisible qualities are clearly seen through your creation. You are surely a God of vibrancy, wonder, splendor, variety ... my words can never portray who you really are. To behold your face - I look forward to that day - to fall on my knees and worship the one who allows me to enjoy all that He has. As the sunsets here and rises elsewhere, I pray that you surround those across the world with your grace and truth. May the gospel of hope be carried to India and Turkey today and everyday until your return. Quicken the spirit of the true worshippers igniting a fire in their souls that causes your word to be a blaze across the earth. Deepen my trust in you. Burn away the draws that tarnish this vessel. Forgive my selfishness. May all my affection be towards you alone. Give me more of you. Pursue my sisters in Christ. Bind their hearts to yours. Paint those vivid sunsets to remind us of your beauty. Send us flowers this spring to remind us of your gift of love. Send us songbirds to remind us the sweet sound of your name. Jesus, you are all that we need. Be my "true love". I love you. Your will be done. You are my Jesus.
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Because he hath set his love upon me, therefore will I deliver him: I will set him on high, because he hath known my name. Psalm 91:14

try & try again...

2006-02-08T11:51:00.000-08:00

never give up. get up and do it.
Today I've done many things, but nothing that most would notice. Still, I look around at all that I have not done. A sense of defeat has come over me. My mind chatter has once again tried to tell me that I will probably not change. But, but, but.... What about this, what about that... Yea, Yea, but... Overwhelmed. Proscrastinating. Lazy? Bored. Inadequate. Not quite sure what it is. Just not sure that I'll ever be different. The whining is a short-lived gratification and/or relief. But to be honest, it makes me even sicker. My intent was to seek solace in writing. As I have just read through the last few lines - I sense the Lord's prompting of my spirit even as I try to escape through writing. I'll never give up. I'll never give in. Maybe for a moment, maybe for a day, but never completely. I have come to know His wonderful promises. Comfort comes over me even now as I recite them in my mind. Once again, He has closed my mouth of things that just should not be part of my vocabulary. I tell my boys over and over that " in our homeschool, we do not say the words I can't do it!" Yet, I succumb to that very thought many days. --Hey, chick - practice what your teaching! Today, my youngest son was trying out his new skates and did fairly well for his first time. What I observed was his determination to learn on his own. All the while, I'm pleading with him to let me help. Yes, he eventually gave in to my pleas, but only to please me, not because he finally realized he needed help. My oldest son was on to new tricks and turns, but every now and then needed a helping hand. Once again, another lesson I can learn through my awesome children. Many times I try to do things on my own and become frustrated at the outcome. In my mind, I've become so consumed with the idea that I can do it own my own that I do not even consider asking for help. And right with me is my Father God who is saying take my hand, listen to my instruction, and follow my example. Then, when I am more experienced, he can trust me with "new tricks and turns"- always remembering that He is there to give his righteous right hand to pull me up and get me going again. He is so good. He is a good teacher, coach, motivator, encourager and Father. I can do all things!
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Father in Heaven, I love you. I praise you and adore you. Forgive me for insisting that I do things on my own. Forgive me of my foolish pride that hinders me from accepting help. Thank you for loving me in spite of my stubborn attitude. You are so good to me. You heal my brokeness. You affirm me. You esteem me. I want to please you. Amazing you are. Thank you for allowing me to see the good in myself and not just the bad. Help me to be better at practicing new things and not giving up on the first attempt. I pray that you help comfort others who struggle with the same things. I pray that you encourage others with my same personality. Teach us Lord to not stumble on our strengths, but to allow you to use them for your work. You knew us before we were created in our mother's womb. You designed me and I'm a wonderful creation. Strengthen my weak traits and send others to help guide me. Your word is so reassuring - You say that you began a good work and you will be faithful to complete it. Complete me. Mold me. You are my potter. I am the clay in your hands. A most beautiful work of the Almighty Artist. Thank you for my creativity. Thank you for my spontaneity. Your will be done. In Jesus name, Amen.
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I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me. Phil 4:13

alluring

2006-02-02T18:52:00.000-08:00

not a best seller.

not a classic.

no pretty pictures.

Remember, you should never judge a book by its cover. For that matter, you should never judge a book by the title or cover illustration. You may miss out on some really good books or waist your precious time on junk reading. I love to read, but as I've shared before, I struggle with completing tasks, and the same goes for books. I have on my nightstand five books that I am casually attempting to read through at the present time. I am progressing... I can honestly say that I have never read a book from beginning to end - quickly - dedicating all reading time to one book. No, not even in high school or college. Cliff notes, of course! ~~~ However, progress has been made and I am celebrating an accomplishment. Reading "Tortured for Christ" was challenging. Give it a try. A true story -- better than prime time "reality" television- Jewish Christian, tortured for 14 years in Romanian Communist prison. I believe it is a must read for anyone claiming to be a follower of Jesus Christ. Some may take my recommendation - most of you never will. The same question repeats in my constant mind chatter -- what is most alluring to me? You know, what is extremely attractive and fascinating? Many things come to mind both good and bad, but none are THE ANSWER. My heart and mind are changing. Things that at one time had highly attractive quality are beginning to look dull. Extremely dull. Moreover, a life totally sold out to Christ is becoming fascinating. Recently, my thoughts have been on people that made real impact on my life and there is one commonality they share -- I truly believe that they would be willing to die for their belief. A life lived for Christ can be risky -- His word says, For whosoever will save his life shall lose it: and whosoever will lose his life for my sake shall find it. For what is a man profited, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul? or what shall a man give in exchange for his soul? ~~~ We torture our own selves over things that just do not matter and have no eternal significance. So then, why not live a life that could possibly entice persecution that may bring about great eternal significance? Ask yourself. If we live wide open for Christ - we should expect persecution of some sort. He said so himself! Don't take my word for it, read His and see.

A man really believes not what he recited in his creed, but only the things he is ready to die for. –Richard Wurmbrand

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Father, I am humbled by your presence in my life. I am honored that in spite of my rebellious attitude, you still love me and pursue me. You never give up on me. You reveal yourself through your wonderful, holy word when I am willing to deny my personal time and spend it with you. Thank you for opening my eyes and mind to think globally about your people. May I not forget my brothers and sisters that are suffering around the world for you. Convict us as Americans to pray without ceasing for our country. We are not far from losing freedom and becoming a persecuted country. Our freedoms as christians are being challenged- slowly and subtly. I know that your heart must be sadenned because your creation has turned from you and fallen into the enticement and false truth that sin presents. Stir in me the desire to tell others about you everywhere I go. I am on mission everyday with every face that I look into - starting in my children. Let me never forget that you call us all to "Go and Tell". To go across the street and across the world. When my feet can't go, remind me that my checkbook and my prayers go along way. Strip me of my selfish desires that consume my time, money, and wonderful resources that you give. Forgive me for flirting with sin. Forgive me for neglecting you and running when I know you are calling. Why do we substitute your fulfilling goodness with artificial junk. Help us all to see that what we keep looking for in other things -- can only be found in you. Guide my eyes, ears, hands and entire being to you - where real, real, real joy and love and life at its best are found. Talk is so cheap and I want to live the word. I want to live out what you teach. You say in your word that we are to be peculiar people. I want to be different than the world. The world is competing, comparing and trying to be different, but most just repeat the same stuff --- I want to be part of your remnant of true followers that are quite abnormal. Praise you for hard days that bring me to your arms. Praise you that I was able to finish an entire book. Thank you for showering grace on me when I'm so full of doubt sometimes. Praise you for progress. For you I will press on. Persevere. Endure Trials. Stand firm during testing. And open my life for more training. You have never failed me. May I prove you over and over as well. May I live a life that resonates you. May I live beyond myself causing others to see your radiance.

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He died for all, that those who live might no longer live for themselves but for him who for their sake died and was raised. 2 Cor 5:15

sabbatical

2006-01-25T14:21:00.000-08:00

haven't left the country... yet.
not in hiding... to a certain degree.
promise to be back...

many thoughts
many moods
many emotions
many questions
many things
many blogs in progress.

coming soon to muddy hands...

yes, on sabbatical, but briefly.
not with pay, of course.
just needing some time, space, and breathing room.

God still reigns.

words

2006-01-12T19:28:00.000-08:00

a picture can paint a thousand words...

Jesus is the Word.

Listen to His word dear friend...In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God,and the Word was God. Then the Word became flesh and dwelt among us. His spirit dwells in us.

Where are you dwelling?

Are you an observer? looking, watching, wondering - not quite sure about him?
Are you in the shadows? full of shame and hurt - not sure if you're even worthy? OR Are you under the shadow of the Almighty God?
Are you approaching? being drawn to him, needing him?
Are you ready to let go of all that hinders you and humbly yield yourself into His presence?
Have you found your place of dwelling in Him - to the point of total delight?
Are you resting on "the Word"?

Where do you dwell? Are you constantly thinking of self? Dwelling on things that are not true, noble or praiseworthy?

just keep going, going, going...

2006-01-05T19:15:00.000-08:00

decisions, decisions, decisions.
and then more decisions. New Year. New challenges. Now I need the determination to back up those decisions. I'm not always the most motivated person. I'm so glad my God is a God of second chances. New beginnings. Fresh Starts. Mercy. And more mercy. He is so cool. He is the only one who never gives up on us year after year. He also promises that what he starts, he will be faithful to bring to completion. That is so reassuring. Especially to one that starts lots of things, but struggles to follow through! Yes, there are many things that I have "thrown out there" that I want to change, start, begin, or resolve this year. You know some of the normal stuff - lose weight, excercise, time management, financial freedom, and organization. blah, blah, blah. Basically, the same things I've said the last couple of years or so. And yes, it is five days into the new year and I'm still lingering. I'm persistent in my mind that what really needs to change is the attitude of my heart. Once the heart changes, usually the body follows! Thank goodness I'm hanging on to my trust in His word. He hasn't given up on me -- so neither will I. Remember in Philipians that He says " I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me". So I've decided that my real resolution is to become more like Christ. Period. When I continue to rely on his strength and not my own, amazing things can happen. Transformation begins. Progress is made. Resolution takes place.
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Oh my Jesus, how we love you so. May we be transformed by your word. May our lives become a detailed reproduction of the image of Christ. Less of me. More of you. I pray that we are found thirsty and hungry for your daily bread. As we recognize who we are in Christ, we will begin to see old things passing away. Praise you that we are new creations. I desire to be set apart. Your word says "be holy, for I am holy". I praise you that you do not require perfection, but progress. Thank you for strenghtening me with perseverance. Thank you for this amazing journey as your pilgrim. Protect and comfort those that are persecuted daily, because they have decided that your love is better than their own life. Yes Lord, your love is better than life. You make every year special. You alone make every day new. Your mercies are new every morning. I praise you for second chances. You make all things beautiful. With you all things are possible. Your will Father, not mine. Break my will. Conform me to you. May this be my family's jubilee year, along with many other brothers and sisters in you. Hallelujah.
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... and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us... Hebrews 12:1
Indeed we count them blessed who endure. You have heard of the perseverance of Job and seen the end intended by the Lord - that the Lord is very compassionate and merciful. James 5:11

gift giving

2005-12-19T21:59:00.000-08:00

Joy to the world. Love has come.
Quickly approaching us are the final pages to another year in the book of life. I’m pleased with the chapter of 2005. God has been tremendously gracious to us and overwhelmed us over and over with his love.
In just five days, we will all be receiving or giving gifts to our dear loved ones and the question that continues to bombard my mind is -- what really is the best gift to give or receive? What gift would anyone enjoy? What gift would satisfy when all others lose their newness and usability? You know the answer -- it is simple. Yes, real simple, but the hardest to give and receive at times. It is not cheap – it costs everything! We all want it and need it. The greatest gift is LOVE.
Love, as I understand it, means doing what is in the best interest of another, regardless of the cost to me. Read that sentence again and let it ruminate in your spirit for a moment or two.
The real spirit of Christmas is Love. God, the Father, sent his only son to be born of flesh and die a cruel death just for us. That is Love – doing what is in the best interest of another, regardless if the cost means death. That is Christmas.
As I have pondered the meaning of Christmas this year, I’ve had to ask myself – Am I really good at “gift giving”. Do I go out of my way for others? Do I allow my schedule to be interrupted to give love? Do I make myself available? Do I care about others more than myself? Do I give with no expectation of receiving? My prayer is that we all become better gift givers. I pray that when people see us coming, they are anxious to receive what we have to offer. May others see in us, the gift that keeps on giving. May we be on every party list, because they know we give the best gift. May we understand the sacrificial love that Christ gave to all who believe in him and never withhold giving him to others.
So if I might ask. How have you spent your Christmas season this year? Too Busy? Tired? Searching? Indulging? Depressed? Wishing for the season to hurry and end? Or have you been – Relaxed? Refreshed? Reflecting? Satisfied? And joyfully waiting for the day with hope that it would never end? My dear loved ones, it is not too late. We still have time to enjoy the celebration of Christmas. We still have time to give the best gift to others and receive the best gift ourselves!
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Daily may I remember the love that has been shown to me. Daily may I give that love to others. May others see Jesus in me. I desire to spill out the love of Christ to those around me. Help me Lord not to be selfish with your beautiful gift. Thank you for sending your son to die, so that I might live. Thank you for abundant life. You are all I could ever hope for.
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Love never gives up. Love cares more for others than for self. Love doesn't want what it doesn't have. Love doesn't strut, Doesn't have a swelled head,
Doesn't force itself on others, Isn't always "me first," Doesn't fly off the handle, Doesn't keep score of the sins of others,
Doesn't revel when others grovel, Takes pleasure in the flowering of truth,

Puts up with anything, Trusts God always, Always looks for the best, Never looks back, But keeps going to the end.
Love never dies... 1 Cor. 13:4-8

turkish delight

2005-12-13T20:39:00.000-08:00

turkish delight.
turkish delight.
more turkish delight.
my eldest son and I had been excitedly waiting for the debut of "The Chronicles of Narnia" with a countdown of days. We love to watch the old version of the movie, and just as we do with all our favorite movies, it is a must to take on characters and quote them throughout our days. My husband believes that we are quite cooky, but I am convinced that his life would be boring without our family drama team. hee..hee..hee.. I love the characters so much in this story, because they possess such great character. Lucy so valiant, Fawn so kind, Susan so gentle, Aslan so strong -- and so on. But the role that is so fun to act out is the white witch. I love to sternly yell - NARNIA - and watch my son bust out laughing or even yelling back. What fun. And for those of you who know the story, you know the spiritual undertones or symbolism that are in the story. I love the simplicity of the Gospel of Jesus. Even a child can understand his truth portrayed through a story about children and animals.
In the story, the white witch asks Edmund if he could have anything what would it be? His reply -- turkish delight. Tahdah. It is granted. Later in the story he is wanting more. Recently we were sent some turkish delight from Narnia and I must tell you that it is sickening sweet. But you do want more. Here's where I'm going ---- Isn't that how sin is in our lives? We get just a "little taste" and then we are back for more. Instead of craving the artificial sweetness of sin, why don't we crave more of the true bread of life? Why not feast on the true delight. His words are like honey to our lips. He satisfies like nothing else can. He never runs out. We don't have to ask for more -- we just have to show up and "sup" with him. He is more than we could ever need. Enjoy him. Delight yourself in him. The more you have of the "real thing", the less you want of the artificial substitute. There is no substitute for him. Nothing!!! Promise ya. Once you get a little bit of Jesus -- you will always come back for more. Take this thought with you -- what do you delight in? what brings you most joy, pleasure, or amusement? Oh my dear friend, yes, there are many good things to delight in, but if Jesus is not one of your first responses -- you do not know what real delight is. Spend time with him today. Open his holy word and you will "taste and see that the Lord is good". Then.... Sit still. Quiet. Reflective. Asking. Seeking. Listening. Praising. Reading. Singing. Thanking. Enjoying. Go - Find out who he is and why he is so delightful!!!!
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I love your word. Your word is honey to my lips. Water to a parched soul. Comfort to the hurting. A healing balm for the sick and wounded. Your word is also the sharp knife that cuts away the cancer of sin. Cut me to the bone and marrow that I may be called your righteousness. Oh how I love your laws and precepts. May I be found delighting in your commandments. Your word captivates me and embraces my spirit. My desire is to enjoy you more and more. Draw me to you -- teach me to delight in you. May I dwell in your presence daily. Hourly. Minute-by-minute. Lord, I want more of you. Thank you for giving me my daily bread and even more. You alone are worthy of all my attention, affection and admiration.
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Delight thyself also in the LORD;
and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart. Psalm 37:4

jailbird

2005-12-12T20:37:00.000-08:00

do not pass go. do not collect $100.
wait a minute! did you say - get out of jail free?
one of my favorite games as a kid was monopoly. not because i could acquire lots of property, but the simple fact that if I landed in jail, I had a good chance to get out of jail free. I'm fortunate to have never spent a single night in jail, but I have lived many days and nights in my own prison. At times my thoughts and actions have been held captive and bound by chains like a prisoner. Therefore, causing my life to be put on hold because of a "bad move" that led to regret, shame, sorrow, discouragement, bitterness and lack of joy. Living a life of daily torture. How silly of me to play those "head games". Even though I have plead guilty to many accusations --- I still am granted the "chance" for freedon. My saviour came to set me free. He came to release the hostages. He came to loose the tight ropes that keep us bound. He came to break the ball and chain that holds us back. He came to present a "get out of jail free" card to anyone willing to accept. Instead of allowing our minds and bodies to be held captive to the lies and destruction of the adversary--- Christ Jesus tells us to "cast down imaginations, and every high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God, and bring into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ". His word says that even though I'm guilty of sin, he came to pardon me. He was given the ultimate penalty -- death. Death row was reality for him. For he "who knew no sin" became sin for us, so that we were made righteous for God. Whoa! That is so incredible. So then, the next time Satan tries to "monopolize" or obtain posession of our minds -- remember to redeem your "chance card".

My Jesus is a God of second chances.

Praise God that I am no longer a jailbird.
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Thank you Jesus for setting me free! Continue to pierce my heart and mind with your truth. When my flesh and mind are not in line with your word, cause me to be sick from my sin. I so desire to no longer be captive to sins of the mind, will and emotions. I want to dwell on things that are true, noble, and praiseworthy. Lord, thank you for teaching me to cast down those things that are not obedient to you. Praise you for real forgiveness. Thank you for helping me to forgive. Honestly, it is really hard at times to relinquish my right to be angry with someone. It is hard to humble myself, but what freedom I experience when I let go and let you control my life. I know that you are still perfecting me and I am grateful that you never give up or leave me. May my heart, soul, and strength be captured by your love. May I become a slave to righteousness. Bind me to you. Thank you for freedom. Unchained. Loosed.

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The Spirit of the Lord GOD is upon me; because the LORD hath anointed me to preach good tidings unto the meek; he hath sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives, and the opening of the prison to them that are bound; Isaiah 61:1

birthday preparations

2005-12-05T21:22:00.000-08:00

celebration. excitement. gifts.
cleaning. cleaning. cleaning.
I don't know about you, but when we have birthday parties around my house, we clean for days. We hang pictures, plant flowers, paint, and we also finish projects that started long before or needed to be started. In other words, I love to have parties because we "get stuff done".
My family is getting ready to celebrate a birthday together. We will be celebrating Jesus Christ's birthday. And once again, I told my family that we would not bring a Christmas tree into this house until we cleaned. Little did I know that the house cleaning that would take place would be in me. You see dear friend, my body is the temple of the Lord. He dwells in me. He has taken up residence in my heart. And He does not like a dirty, stinking vessel. He wants a clean heart and he loves to cleanse me. I realize my need for cleansing. I have even called the "funk" by name. He has just the solution and knows just how hard to scrub, rub and rinse.
In Psalm 51, the psalmist writes "Wash me thoroughly from my iniquity, and cleanse me from my sin. Purge me with hyssop, and I shall be clean: Wash me , and I shall be whiter than snow. Make me hear joy and gladness. Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me. Restore to me the joy of Your salvation." Wow! Once we recognize that the "dwelling place is dirty", then we can allow the cleaning to begin. What a joy to know that when we are willing and able to call our sins by name, he is willing and able to forgive us and cleanse us. Once our spirit is clean, we really want to celebrate. As we approach this Christmas season and all the festivities that are involved, I pose this question to you, as well as myself. What needs to be cleaned out, finished, or started in our hearts? What will it take for you to enjoy yourself this year on Christ Jesus' birthday? Is there any jealousy, anger, greed, or pride that is keeping you from experiencing Christmas in the way that he intended you to? Is there anything at all in your "house" that stinks? If so, muster up the energy and get busy. We only have a few weeks left to get ready. Cleaning is not much fun, but the end result is dazzling. Birthday preparations are time consuming, but watching others receive their gift is so delightful. Give the best gift this year to someone. Give them Jesus. When we receive him --- life becomes a party!!
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Oh Jesus, I have called upon you and you have answered. Thank you for searching me and showing me what needs to be cleansed. As I allow you to remove these things in my life, be patient with me. Sometimes the tearing and stripping away really hurts. I know that the end result is dazzling. Your love and forgiveness is beyond compare. Thank you for speaking to me so clearly. Your word says that if we seek you with all our heart, we will find you. I have found you. I have found where real life is. Keep me from sin. Heal my brokeness, but leave the cracks so that I may spill out drops of the living water wherever my feet may go. May I celebrate you.
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Search me, O God, and know my heart; try me, and know my thoughts,
and see if any wicked way is in me; and lead me in the way everlasting.
Psalm 139:23-24

recognition

2005-11-27T01:03:00.000-08:00

many are the days that pass us by.
many are the blessings that come our way.
many thanks are never expressed, nor the recogniton
given to the one who gives to us so freely.
When I keep my heart and soul in a steady gaze on the life-changing gift of Jesus Christ, my eyes become like his. I begin to see the world differently. I become increasingly thankful for the life that he has given to me and I desire to celebrate his goodness and mercy. Praise God!!
As our family has been talking about and remembering the first Thanksgiving and how hard it must have been, I have had to do some serious introspection of my own gratitude. First, I'll remind you that "gratitude is defined as the feeling of being thankful to somebody for something". The definition does not say "thankful to somebody for good things". So as I have mulled over in my mind these last few days what I am grateful for, my list is different than before. I have been confronted to go just a tad bit deeper and have found myself being truly thankful for the "not so good things". Stay with me... Second, the definition of celebration is to observe with ceremonies of respect, festivity, and rejoicing; to extol or praise; to make widely known; display. Thanksgiving is celebration. The Lord has prompted my spirit to celebrate his dominion, proclaim his goodness and recognize that he is the "I am". He alone is the giver of life. Must I be reminded that his word says "to give thanks in everything", and "for my lips to continually praise his name". Our God is a jealous God. He requires, commands, insists and desires for us to recognize him for who he is. Consider with me about our God and what celebration he deserves and requires. There is none like him, nor ever will be. He knows what I need when I need it. He is my provision. He heals, restores, defends, shelters, grants peace, comforts, loves, brings friendship, and he knows the deepest parts of my soul and still wants me for his own!! He deserves all my thanks and all recogniton. Celebrate him. Offer your sacrifice of praise and thanksgiving. He has made me glad.
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I praise you King! You have made me glad. Thank you for your kindness. Loyalty. Patience. My life is yours and all that I have. Thank you for a husband that is ready, willing and waiting to go to the ends of the earth to proclaim your saving grace. Thank you for his strong convictions, boldness, and does not compromise with the world. Grant him clear vision that he may know the next step to take. Thank you that he is long-suffering and gentle to me and my children. He has always provided and made a way for me to be home with our children. Thank you that he supports me in all that I do or even attempt to do. You have lavished your love on me by giving him to me. You knew he would love me for who I am. Thank you for my two precious boys. Thank you for the spirit of God that already exists in my Crash. He amazes me how much he already knows about you. May his sensitive spirit never be squelched by this insensitive world. I pray that Crash and Toogie will fall madly in love with you and surrender their lives in service for you. May they desire nothing more than to do your will. Thank you for Toogie and his strong will. May he be strong in the Lord and full of your might. Thank you for laughter in our home. Thank you for loud voices, including mine. Thank you that my family allows me a few minutes of fame each week when I burst out in song like Julie Andrews. Thank you for the sound of music. Thank you for the "not so good" things that have allowed me to have understanding, compassion, concern, empathy and sympathy for others. If I had not lived these things, my witness would not be the same. Thank you for broken bones that have healed and cause me to walk again. Thank you that I was able to pass my walker on to my pastor. Thank you for brother Jay and his precious Sheri. Thank you for a colicky baby that taught me to cuddle, trust you and give consolation to another momma. Thank you for the seasons of depression that have taught me about your strength, your truth, your promises and the hope that comes from you alone.Thank you for placing so many people in my life who need your encouragement and your hope. Thank you for comforting me in times of loneliness and despair and reminding me that you are my closest friend and all I ever need. Thank you for giving me boldness to tell others how you have taken me from the miry clay and set my feet on your solid rock. Thank you for cancer that taught me to "be anxious for nothing" and to see the power of prayer. Thank you for healing me andI praise you that I am in remission. Thank you for a mother who loved you more than anything and brought me up in the training and admonition of the Lord. Thank you for momma quoting the word of God to me at an early age and teaching me to forever praise your name. Thank you for my Aunt Deloras who always believes in me and speaks real-life encouragement. Thank you for my amazing father and mother-in love who treat me as their very own. May I be as loving, generous and concerned for my children's families to come. Thank you that they love my children dearly, enjoy our company, and never get tired of us eating their fabulous foods. Thank you for Papa's crab cakes, Mimi's chocolate cake, and Dean's Barbecue. Thank you for so many wonderful friends. Grant wisdom and discernment to those who are eager to do your work. Thank you for Spirit-and-Truth Ministries. Use 'em Lord. You know how much they want to spread the word. Thank you for being silent at times to teach us to "be still and know that you are God". Thank you for financial diffuculties that are teaching us that you are Jehovah-Jirah and to be great stewards of your provision. Thank you for teaching us contentment and to store our treasure in heaven not on earth. Thank you for the socks for Crash. Thank you for the diapers for Toogie. Thank you for the beautiful $24 Christmas tree when we had $24 dollars in our pocket! Thank you for Jesus. Thank you for sending your son to destroy the works of the devil!!! May my life be a sacrifice of thanksgiving and celebration of you. Love you daddy.
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Praise Jehovah. O give thanks to Jehovah; for He is good; for His mercy endures forever.
Who can utter the mighty acts of Jehovah, or cause all His praise to be heard?
Blessed are those who keep judgment, he who does righteousness at all times.
Remember me, O Jehovah, with the favor of Your people; O visit me with Your salvation,
that I may see the good of Your chosen, that I may rejoice in the gladness of Your nation, to glory with Your inheritance. Psalm 106:1-5

indescribable glory

2005-11-07T22:58:00.000-08:00

" And in the morning you shall see

the glory of the Lord..." Ex 16:7

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" Be still and know that I am God;

I will be exalted among the nations,

I will be exalted in the earth! " Ps 46:10

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" For the invisible things of him from the creation of the world are clearly seen, being understood by the things that are made, even his eternal power and Godhead; so that they are without excuse: " Rom 1:20

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Father, I will extol your name at all times. Your praise shall forever be on my lips. I am mesmerized by the magnificient beauty of your creation. As I gaze upon the beauty of your heavens and the earth, I am reminded of your strength, brilliance and royalty. I am aware of your dominion over me and the entire universe. Only you reign supreme. How honored I am that you know the very deepness of my thoughts and still call me daughter, friend, beloved. May my words be few. May my love be surpassing. May my service be pleasing. Send me to people that need your soothing balm to heal there broken spirits. Multiply my family's faith that we may live without limits when it comes to reaching this desperate world for you. Provide guidance to the wandering children who have forgotten the sound of the Father's voice. Raise up uncompromising warriors to fight the enemy of this day. Give us clean hands. Give us pure hearts. Break my will and conform it to yours. Go before us Lord. You are our sheperd. We shall not want. You, oh Father make us to lie down in green pastures and beside the still waters. Whom shall we fear? You are for us. My husband, my children and I am victors in Christ Jesus. No weapons formed against the children of God will prosper. We shall not be moved. We are like trees planted by the water side, strong cedars and towering oaks. You alone are life. You are the tree of life. You are the way, the truth, and the life. Praise God. I'm alive. Praise God that we are healed. Praise God that we have hope. Praise God that we will reign with you eternally! I love you. May you bless and keep us. May your face shine upon us. May you grant us peace and provision. You alone are faithful. Thank you for saving me from death and destruction. I am redeemed by the blood of the lamb. My children will arise and call me blessed. May my boys be light in the world. May they exude the true meaning of a life lived for Christ. Use my husband to bring salvation to the nations. Set his feet on high places, place him before dignitaries, that all may see the true splendor of living wide open, fanatically, jacked-up for Jesus. Test us. Try us. Refine us like pure gold and precious silver. Polish us like unblemished stones. We are yours. The sheep of your pasture. We are not our own, you bought us for a price. We are redeemed by the blood of the lamb. Comfort those close to our hearts who are across the world, denying themselves for your name sake. Provide the perserverance needed to continue to run the race before us. Keep our eyes fixed on the price --You, Jesus-- so that we may finish hearing you say "well done my good and faithful servant." Convict our hearts of the sin that holds us back from moving into the next high place with you. May you find my family delighting in your fulfilled law. Your love is better than life. I am yours. Father, do as you please.

chameleon in the mirror

2005-11-06T23:10:00.000-08:00

i am like a chameleon- easily changeable.
i am fiesty, dramatic, messy and distracted, but i am also quiet, solemn, neat and focused. i like me.
I haven't always felt this way and quite frankly, I still on occasion struggle with shrill whines and grumbles about who I am. So do many of us, if the truth be known. My boys and I are avid fans and readers of Eric Carle books. One of our favorite books deals with a chameleon who is not content with who God created them to be. He/she wishes they could be a little of this and a little of that. Only to find out in the end that being who he was created to be is the best choice. The story ends with the chameleon's thought --
" I wish I could be myself".
Do you ever wish you were someone else? Do you ever wish you could be a little of this or more of that? Are you content with who he has not only created you to be, but called you to be? Are you living out your own reality of life with Christ or what you think someone else would have you be? Life is so beautiful. We are each so distintive. Our creator fashioned us so perfect in his image. He really thinks we are great. So why do we tend to forget the truth from his word? Our creator wants us to like who we are because he is the master craftsman and you are his handiwork. He who began a good work will follow through to completion. God is doing some incredible reconstructive work in my life. Couldn't we all use an ambush makeover some moments in our lives. The truth is, Christ is revealing the truth about who I am through his word. My dear brothers and sisters in Christ Jesus, lend your ear to hear-- open your eyes to see --taste and see that the Lord God is good. He tells us over and over in his verse that we are made in his image and that he can transform us to his likeness. I would love to share with you, as well as remind myself, his pounding truth as to who we are: blessed with every spiritual blessing, holy and blameless before him in love, adopted by Jesus Christ, accepted, forgiven, sealed with the holy spirit, alive, free, justified, chosen, loved with an everlasting love, desired, wonderful, beautiful, empowered, royalty, redeemed, conquerors, ambassadors, full of hope and the list goes on... Are you having trouble believing this could actually be you? Don't take my word for it --- verify yourself -- His word is living and powerful, and sharper than any two-edged sword. His word declares the true identity of who we are and gives us true value and worth. I love it. I love it. I love it. Seeing one's self through the eyes of God makes all the difference in how I see me!!! Take another look in the mirror. Can you see the reflection of the one who loves you for who you are...
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I love you Lord. Thank you for creating me just as I am. Take the areas in my life that do not bring glory to your name. Burn away the draws that keep me from shining for you. Teach me contentment. Allow me vision to see the goodness and beauty that you have bestowed upon me. May my entire life be a declaration of your consuming love. May I be found devoted to your word to the point that every thought becomes obedient to you. I praise you my God and my friend. You are all that I need. Draw me close to you that my soul will scream of your majesty.
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All of us! Nothing between us and God, our faces shining with the brightness of his face. And so we are transfigured much like the Messiah, our lives gradually becoming brighter and more beautiful as God enters our lives and we become like him. 2 Cor 3:18

chisel

2005-10-19T22:54:00.000-07:00

becoming the likeness of Christ.
the process is not always painless, but the completed work is stunning.
Imagine with me the description of the sculptor at work--
"He attacked the stone with such fiery energy that one expected to see the block shattered to pieces. With one blow he sent chips three to four fingers thick flying into the air, and penetrated to a point indicated by a drilling with such precision that he might have destroyed the whole stone, had he cut slightly deeper into it." --Blaise de Vigenre
There have been and will be times in our lives when the master sculptor will chip away with intensity the layers that must be removed in order to create his masterpiece. He knows exactly where to start, how hard to hammer, and what his completed work should look like. He is precise and never makes mistakes. He allows brokeness to take place, but never destruction. He is a incomparable craftsman. Praise Him my brothers & sisters in Christ.
The late Michelangelo would sometimes polish his statues to look smooth and shiny while others where left with chisel marks. The chisel marks gave shape and a feeling of being alive when viewed from a distance. Does Christ do the same in us? Just asking. What chisel marks do I have to be seen? What about you? What does the world see in me when they are close up? What do they see when I'm viewed from a distance? The end result should be a life gleaming and vibrant.
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Thank You Father that you love us so much that we are a continued work in progress. Thank you for the chisel marks that you leave in our lives. Thank You that you never tire of your work. I praise you Master that even when the process takes months or years to complete, you remain faithful to finish what you started. May you look upon me and be pleased with what you have created. I love you.
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And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.
For whom he did foreknow, he also did predestinate to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brethren. Romans 8:38-39

whereabouts

2005-10-18T10:50:00.000-07:00

true are your promises.
gracious and kind.
I'm grateful that you never change. Thankful we should be that he remains consistent when we do not. Thankful I am that we start over with him right where we are. A woman of my word I desire to be. Consistent, unchanging, solid, upright, righteous -- even when the world around me seems to be ever-changing.
Pray without ceasing for this is the will of God. Possible this is. When we seek him, we find him. I love when I wake up with a song in my heart and the Lord on my mind. This morning has been such a blessing to me. I'm thankful today that we made the choice to homeschool this year. Yes, it can be quite overwhelming for me at times, but the learning that takes place even in our craziness far out ways the stress. When we snuggle up in the morning and have deep conversations at an unhurried breakfast , I thank God for these importantes momentos juntos -special moments together. Encountering Jesus in the everyday stuff is not always easy, because we are usually too busy to find him in our midst. However, he is always right with us, no matter where we are or what we are doing. How kind he is to go with us each step of the way. He is there when we travel the dimmest, rockiest path or when we are wide open on the highway of holiness. Praise God from whom all blessings flow. His word says he never ( which means never) leaves us. We must choose to engage him and/or accept his invitation to spend our day with him. Finding him at the foot of the bed, at the kitchen table, or in the backyard is life of joy! Look, look, look --- I see Jesus!!! Is that the response of your heart with great elation? Join with me as we seek to find the one who is always revealing his whereabout!!
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Thank you that when we seek you we find you! I praise you Lord for all that you have blessed us with. You always supply our needs according to your riches in glory. You have never given us more than we can bear. You have always reminded us that you are with us through all things. I can do all things that you have called me to do because of your strength that empowers me. Thank you that your mercies are new every morning. Thank you that your mercy is sweeter each day as we realize how you are in control in the midst of every day life. Oh how I do love you Lord.
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It is by Jehovah's kindnesses that we are not destroyed, because His mercies never fail.
They are new every morning; great is Your faithfulness. Lamentations 3:22-23

vivid

2005-10-15T11:46:00.000-07:00

seek and you will find.
gaze and become mesmerized.
a trail of thoughts pipes through my mind trying to siphon into my very soul. one word causing a chain reaction of many words turning into a paragragh of thoughts and phrases. I have to admit that they are not always good, pure, noble and praiseworthy. My spirit screams at me to take captive those thoughts and cast them back to the depths of Sheoul from whence they came. I must allow my mind to be filled with the vivid truth of your brilliant love- resounding hope and smothering joy that is offered to me as an heir to Christ's kingdom. Power, love, and a sound mind has been given to those who lay their life before him. How much space am I willing to allow you to occupy in my mind? You require it all -- but for some reason I have not allowed an eviction of some space. Is there anything more beautiful than your love? -- Is there anything more captivating than your touch? -- I know the answer. I think you have made it real loud,vivid and clear.

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Oh Father how I desire things of you? May I be found praising you in the most tumultous of times, as well as, the most exuberant. Teach me to take captive those thoughts that are not of you. Conform my mind. May other people be encouraged by the vivid life they see in me as a result of you transforming me into your likeness. Praise you. You are so much larger than life.
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I hate half-hearted thoughts; but Your Law do I love.
You are my hiding-place and my shield; I hope in Your Word. Psalm 119:113-114

triumph

2005-10-03T00:12:00.000-07:00

knight in shining armor.
the castle of splendor.
amazing gowns glistening with brilliant jewels. As a child, I guess I imagined that all my dreams would come true. As an adult I have realized that they have, but not as I had dreamed them before. You see, my knight did come to get me, but he actually came as a king-- the King of Kings. My beautiful castle is the name of the Lord which is a strong tower. I am given full access into the throne room to sit at his feet. He invites me to feast with Him at his banquet table. He is a fortress from the enemy. And as for my amazing gowns -- he clothes me in righteousness which is more brilliant than any stone. I am the King's and He is mine!
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Jesus, lover of my soul, how I long to be forever in your presence. Your love captivates me and brings rest to my soul. Time alone with you is what I ask humbly for. Your words are like honey to my lips. Fill me with resounding praise and overwhelming joy. Refine me. Set me before kings or peasants and I will glorify your name. I will not be moved. You are my fortress, my ever-present help in times of need. Praise you for your sovereignty. Thank you for leading me gallantly!
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But thanks be to God! He always leads us triumphantly in Christ and through us spreads everywhere the fragrance of knowing him. 2 Cor 2:14

warrior

2005-09-29T22:15:00.000-07:00

bruised, banged, scraped...
but still smiling and shining.
Once again, God reveals himself through the lives of my children.
My little toogie knows what it means to be experienced in battle. He took quite a few blows today and ended the evening with Moe's congas on top of him. Luckily, he did not lose his left eye! For the remainder of the evening, he snuggled RUFF on the couch as he indulged in nutter butters. I thought I would capture a cute pouty face with my camera, but to my surprise all I could get was a great smile.
Isn't he a poetic picture of the life of a believer in Jesus Christ??? We are hard-pressed, perplexed, persecuted, struck down, but yet not crushed, desperate, forsaken or destroyed. I'm reminded that my tribulations, trials, and afflictions are nothing compared to the heaviness and filth that Jesus must have felt when he took all of my sins on his body. For he who knew no sin became sin-- just for me-- just for you-- just for anyone that will call upon his name and be saved! For that very reason I can keep smiling. Just like my little Toogie!
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How wonderful to know that you love me so much. Teach me to cling to you in the midst of battles. Guide me in your truth. Carry me when I'm wounded. Pick me up when I fall down. Yes Lord, I will forever praise your name and sing of your greatness.
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The steps of a good man are ordered by the LORD: and he delighteth in his way. Though he fall, he shall not be utterly cast down: for the LORD upholdeth him with his hand. Psalm37:23-24

phenomenom

2005-09-29T16:10:00.000-07:00

the meanings of many things in life are short, simple and sincere when spoken by a child.
adults can complicate things that are quite obvious to the untainted mind of innocent youth.
Before enjoying a story from the Book of John this morning, I pose the question to my oldest son, "do you know what a miracle is?"
Without hesitation he replied , "It is something that nobody can do, and it is something really amazing."
I'm glad I asked before I went into a full-throttle synopsis of what a miracle is.
>>> miracle: An event that appears inexplicable by the laws of nature and so is held to be supernatural in origin or an act of God; any amazing or wonderful occurrence.
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You tell us in your word to have the faith of a child -- help us Lord to not make our relationship with you so difficult. Give me simplicity of thought that I may see you in everday, moment -by- moment activities. Bless the Lord, oh my soul and all that is within me -- Bless your holy name.
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Then having rowed about twenty-five or thirty furlongs, they saw Jesus walking on the sea and drawing near the ship... John 6:19

spinning webs...

2005-09-28T22:23:00.000-07:00

my two sons are totally awesome, way cool and wide open.
two mini-me's and two mini-moe's running around!
We have opened " The Home School" this year and at times I ask myself if I have reached the point of no return. I have been seriously challenged with this whole concept. However, I am learning so much about my entire family, including myself. Wow! Can anyone say ADD. That is me. My Aunt Deloras and I like to call it "spinning". You know, when you just spin from one thing to another and somehow complete at least one thing for the day. I'm reminded of the busy spider who spins and spins, but by the end of the evening she has completed her work. Then one may see remains of things caught in her web -- raindrops, insects. What consolation to me, just knowing that in spite of their spinning mother, my children will be captured by my love and devotion to teach and train them.
God's grace (giving me what I do not deserve) is totally sufficient for all my family's needs.
I am truly honored to know that they have been entrusted to me.
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Father, Praise you for my beautiful beaus. May you find me portraying the character of Christ. Even in the hard moments of my day, give me the strength to clothe myself with righteousness. When those precious brown eyes meet me face-to-face, may they look beyond the visible and see a soul that longs to please you. May they see this earthen vessel as only you do -- pure and holy. Praise you for my moe that is sold out to you and loves me even when my "web" gets demolished!
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The spider skillfully grasps with its hands, And it is in king's palaces. Proverbs 30:28

why muddy hands?

2005-09-27T00:38:00.000-07:00

the potter's hands are rarely clean.
The constant creating with the clay requires that one's hands must stay muddy.
As I seek to please you Lord, my desire is that you find me with "mud" on my hands. I want to be found in places and with people that require me to get my hands "muddy".
I think of you Jesus when you spat on the clay and placed it over the blind man's eyes. what a beautiful day that must have been. I can share the excited with that blind man -- you have also made me to see -- the eyes of my heart have been opened to know and understand your love.
Thank you for revealing your self to me.
Thank you for loving me today in spite of my attitude.
I praise you for continually molding me into your likeness.
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The LORD God is my strength, and he will make my feet like hinds' feet, and he will make me to walk upon mine high places. Habakkuk 3:19